1993 GI Joe Street Fighter 2 Vega

1993 GI Joe Street Fighter 2 Vega – Dragon Fortress Reviews

1993 GI Joe Street Fighter 2 Vega

Of noble blood, Vega has successfully combined the Japanese art of Ninjutsu with the skills he learned as a matador. He honed his ninja skills by watching Ninja Scroll 12 times in one week, and he’s pretty sure he saw a cow once. So, total ninja and matador. The result is a beautiful, yet fearsome, ballet in which led him to call himself “The Spanish Ninja” on all online forums and job applications. Vega lives by the philosophy that beauty is strength. Despising anything ugly, such as Hammer Pants and any post-1986 McDonald’s play place, Vega views himself as perfect– much how he views all Lisa Frank (™) products. He wears a mask to protect his face from enduring damage in battle, but it really just gives him pretty bad acne and allows him to smell his own tapas breath. Grody, dude.

Used by M. Bison primarily as an assassin, Vega often dispatches foes with his claw (sold separately).

Qualified Expert: All Ninja Force accessories, All NATO and Warsaw Pact chainlink fences, red roses, hockey mask, white roses, all animal-tested skin creams and moisturizers, wolverine claw (singular)

From the Files of M. Bison, Shadowloo Overlord: “Vega is a useful idiot. He’s like one of those kids who buys swords at the mall and practices in his backyard after school, but instead of his backyard, it’s my courtyard. Oh, and guess who buys his claws for him? Yeah, that’s right, me. Even though the guy has more money than sense, he’s super stingy. Still, someone has to distract Guile and Chun-Li when they come knocking at my door, and sometimes Vega gets a pretty good cheap shot in. Oh, and he’s really not that handsome. Have you seen Christian Slater lately? I mean, come on. There’s really no comparison.”

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The Hardest of the HardCorps! – A Love Letter to Lanard’s The Corps!

 

Lanard Corps! Chopper and Whispering Willie

Only GI Joe is GI Joe. Nobody Beats GI Joe. GI Joe Is There.

But what if someone else is GI Joe? What if someone might, in fact, beat GI Joe? And what if someone else is there?

Dear readers, I present to you– Lanard’s THE CORPS!

The Corps! is a highly skilled group of soldiers, hockey players, skiiers, wrestlers, spacemen, forest rangers, and street punks recruited from all over the world to fight a nebulous enemy force. No, not that team… the other one. Members of The Corps! are divided into units based on each individual’s skills, weapons, specialties, pants-wearing preferences, and the colors of their outfits.

If you can afford them (and you probably can), then you can hire THE CORPS!

A few weeks ago, I got bored of looking for the few GI Joe figures on top of my “most wanted” list. They’re all painfully expensive and hard to come by. Granted, there are plenty of great figures I don’t have, but I was feeling defeated.

To curb that feeling of rejection and further feed my plastic army man habit, I purchased a few lots of vintage, o-ring style Lanard Corps! toys from eBay. I bought one carded “8 man team” collector’s pack and a few mixed lots.

Lanard Corps!

This caused me to remember everything I love about The Corps!… and just a few things I don’t.

The Corps!, oddly, aren’t written or spoken about too much in the GI Joe community despite their similar construction, great sculpts, awesome vehicles, and neat character concepts.

So, in an effort to fill that void, I assembled a crack commando squad to nerd out about THE CORPS!

Since this is a huge post, even by Dragon Fortress standards, I’ve included a handy table of contents below. Simply click the chapter you’d like to read or, better yet, enjoy the whole post.

Let’s party.

Continue reading “The Hardest of the HardCorps! – A Love Letter to Lanard’s The Corps!”